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搞笑七分钟英语短剧剧本

发布时间：2018-08-27 08:58:45 来源：文档文库

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陈:Hello, everyone, have you ever seen the movie<Beautiful Life>? Yeah, you are right, I'm the director--R Z. Recently, I will direct a new movie, today, there will be an audition and I will select three actors to perform in this film. OK, let's begin. The first part, talent show, let's welcome actor number one.

陈:大家好，你们看过<美丽人生>吗？是的，我是这部电影的导演R Z。最近我要导演一部新的电影。今天在这里将举行一场面试，我要选出三位演员来拍摄这部电影。好的，接下来就开始面试的第一个环节，才艺表演，让我们欢迎第一位面试者。

杨: It’s so easy for me to get this character. (面朝观众说) Nice to meet you, my dear director.

杨:我一定能轻而易举地拿到这个角色。(边走边朝观众说)很高兴见到你，亲爱的导演。

陈:Nice to meet you too, so, introduce yourself.
陈:很高兴见到你，那么请介绍一下你自己吧。

杨:I'm CK Yang, you know. I don't have too many achievements, I just won six World Music Awards, eight American Music Awards, and…(做沉思状) oh, I forgot, two Oscar Awards, it's just a piece of cake for me, you know, I...

杨:我是CK 杨，你知道的，我也没有太多的成就，我仅仅拿了6次世界音乐奖，8次全美音乐奖，对了，差点忘了这个，还有二次奥斯卡奖，这对我来说不过是小意思，你们知道的，我。。。

陈:Stop, stop! Time is limited, just begin.
陈:停下，快停下，时间有限，快点开始吧。

杨:OK! I'll sing my first song to conquer you --my heart will go on. Just enjoy it. Music(音乐响起).
杨:好的，我将演唱我的成名曲来征服你----我心永恒。请欣赏。(音乐响起)

near, far, wherever you are

I believe that the heart does go on

once more, you opened the door

and you're here in my heart,

and my heart will go on and on.（唱跑调）

陈:OK, that’s enough, I was wondering how could you get so many awards?

陈:可以了，够了！我真的好奇你唱的这么难听，是怎么拿到这么多奖的

杨:Dear director, you don’t appreciate my style, I’m sure you will regret. (骄傲的离开)

杨:我亲爱的导演，你不懂欣赏我的风格，我保证你会后悔的。(骄傲的离开)

陈:Oh, I'm dying, hope the next one will give me a surprise. Next one!

陈:天啊，我要受不了，希望下一个会带给我惊喜。下一个！

杜:To be, or not to be, It's a question!(走到陈面前),I'm glad to see you, my dear princess.

杜:生存还是死亡?这是个问题。(走到陈面前)很荣幸见到您，我的公主。

陈(高兴状):oh, it's really a big surprise, so what's your name?

陈(高兴状):天啊，实在是太惊喜了，你叫什么？

杜:My name? Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan?(陈摇头:no), it's ok, how about Robin Meade?(陈摇头:no), eh... you must know Beyonce Giselle, right?(陈继续摇头:no) (杜情绪激动)What do you know? You know nothing! How could you sit here?

杜:我的名字？哦~等一下。你知道特里什·里根吗？(陈摇头:不知道)，没关系，那你知道罗宾·米德吗？(陈摇头:不知道)eh…那你一定知道碧昂丝·吉赛尔？(陈摇头:不知道),(杜,情绪激动)，你知道什么？你什么都不知道，有什么资格坐在这里。

陈(气愤状):you, you, how dare you!

陈(气愤状):你你你，你怎么敢!

杜:ok, relax, it doesn't matter, you don’t need to learn about them, they’re just my guests, you just need to know me, the most famous talk show host and the greatest poet--Oprah!

杜:好的，没关系，你不需要认识这些人，他们都曾是我的嘉宾，你只需要认识我，这世上最著名的脱口秀主持人和最棒的诗人--奥普拉！

陈:I don't care who you are, just show me your talent.

陈:我不在乎你是谁，快开始你的表演。

杜:Well, listen to my original poem. Once, I had found my best love, but I didn’t cherish her. Until I lost her, I felt regret. It is the most painful thing in the world. If God can give me another chance, I will say three words to her. That is-- ‘I love you’!

杜:好，下面请大家欣赏我的原创诗。曾经有一份真挚的爱情摆在我面前，但是我没有珍惜，等到失去后才后悔莫及，尘世间最痛苦的事莫过于此，如果老天可以再给我一次机会的话，我会对那个女孩说三个字--“我爱你”。

陈(起鸡皮疙瘩状):oh, I can't stand, leave me alone！

陈(起鸡皮疙瘩状):天啊，我受不了啦，请离我远一点！

杜(转身离开,继续台词):If there is a time limit, I hope, it will be (回头,对陈)10 thousand years.

杜(转身离开,继续台词):如果要在这三个字上加一个期限的话，我希望是(回头,对陈)一万年。

陈:Next one!

陈:下一个！

程:(男扮女装,风情万种,妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞吻):oh, honey, dear, sweet, darling director, the most beautiful, charming, sexy girl is coming, everybody knows me, right? Yeah, I'm Hello Kitty, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打个响指，在这里突然一改妩媚的样子开始打b-box). (鞠躬,向观众谢幕) thank you.(面向导演) honey, is it a wonderful performance?

程:(男扮女装，风情万种，妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞吻):哦，我的甜心，亲爱的导演，最漂亮，有魅力，性感的女孩登场了，大家都认识我对吧，没错，我就是Kitty猫，睁大你们的双眼，屏住你们的呼吸，我将要带来一场独特而美好的表演，我相信大家都会为我的表演疯狂的，(打个响指，在这里突然一改妩媚的样子开始打b-box). (鞠躬,向观众谢幕),谢谢大家。(面向导演) 甜心，我的表演完美吗？

陈:(作目瞪口呆状)…

程:(在陈眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok?

程:(在陈眼前晃手),哦，亲爱的，你没事吧。

陈:eh...my god, I need a beautiful actress, but you are a little... Get out.

陈:嗯…上帝啊，我需要一个美丽的女演员，但是你看起来有一点…出去!

程:oh no! Sweet ,you break my heart...(掩面离去)

程:哦，不！甜心，你伤了我的心…(掩面离去)

陈:oh, it's really a terrible day! Why it is so difficult to find excellent actors. You three, come here!

陈:天啊，今天实在是太糟糕了！为什么找个完美的演员就这么难。你们三个过来吧。

三人跑进来, 程:(妩媚状):Honey, you prefer my performance, right?

三人跑进来, 程:(妩媚状):甜心，你更喜欢我的表演，对吗？

杨:Director, you prefer my singing, right?

杨:导演，你更喜欢我的歌对吗？

杜:Princess, you prefer my poem, right?

杜:公主，你更喜欢我的诗对吗？

三人抢着说:I passed, right?(然后同时定住)

三人抢着说:我通过面试了，对吗？(然后同时定住)

陈:God. I want three good actors,(叹气) but there are only three idiots.(电话声响，接电话) What? We will change the movie into <three idiots>. Wait a minute, three idiots, like them? OK, I think I’ve got a good idea! (挂电话,拍手唤醒三人) I have a good news, you three, pass!