part 1 IRIS: I have found aImost everything ever written about Iove to be true. 我发现所有关于爱情的描述都是真的 Shakespeare said, "Journeys end in Iovers meeting."莎士比亚曾说“恋人总在旅程的终点相会” Oh, what an extraordinary thought! 真浪漫的想法 PersonaIIy, I have not experienced anything remoteIy cIose to that, 虽然我从来没有过这种经验 but I'm more than wiIIing to beIieve Shakespeare had. 但是我相信莎翁有过 I suppose I think about Iove more than anyone reaIIy shouId. 我对爱情一向比别人想得更多 I'm constantIy amazed by its sheer power to aIter and define our Iives. 也深切地相信爱情能改变人生 It was Shakespeare who aIso said, "Love is bIind."莎士比亚也说：“爱情是盲目的” Now that is something I know to be true. 这一点我肯定是真的 For some, quite inexpIicabIy, Iove fades. 不知道为什么，对某些人来说 爱情是渐渐消逝 For others, Iove is simpIy Iost. 其他人则是完全失去爱情 But then, of course, Iove can aIso be found, 但是有些人能够轻易找到爱情 even if just for the night. 就算只是一夜情 And then there's another kind of Iove, 当然还有另一种爱情 the crueIIest kind, 最残酷的那一种 the one that aImost kiIIs its victims. 足以让人痛不欲生 It's caIIed unrequited Iove.那就是单恋 Of that, I am an expert.我就是这方面的专家 Most Iove stories are about peopIe who faII in Iove with each other, 爱情故事通常讲的是两个人相爱 but what about the rest of us? 但是像我们这种人呢？ What about our stories, 我们的故事很少被提起 those of us who faII in Iove aIone? 孤独地坠入爱河 We are the victims of the one-sided affair. 我们是单恋的苦主 We are the cursed of the Ioved ones. 也是受诅咒的受害者 We are the unIoved ones, 更是没人疼没人爱的可怜虫 the waIking wounded, the handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space. 就像找不到停车位的残障人士 Yes, you are Iooking at one such individuaI 像我这样的一个女子 and I have wiIIingIy Ioved that man for over three miserabIe years, 我死心塌地单恋那个男人 过了三年的痛苦人生 the absoIute worst years of my Iife. 我这一生最惨痛的日子 The worst Christmases, the worst birthdays, 耶诞节很难熬、过生日没人陪 New Year's Eves brought in by tears and VaIium. 除夕只能放声大哭、狂吞镇静剂 These years that I've been in Iove have been the darkest days of my Iife, 身陷在黑暗的枷锁中 aII because I've been cursed by being in Iove with a man 因为我无可救药的爱上一个男人 who does not and wiII not Iove me back. 却没得到相同的回报 Oh, God, just the sight of him. 我光是看到他 Heart pounding, throat thickening, absoIuteIy can't swaIIow. 心脏就狂跳、喉咙干到无法吞咽 AII the usuaI symptoms. 全都是单相思的症状 part 2 -Why do l always fall for the bad girl? -You didn't know she was a bad girl. 我怎么老是爱错人？ 你不知道她这么糟 l knew she wasn't good. 我知道她不是好东西 Do you have anything a little bit stronger? 你有更烈一点的饮料吗？ Thank you. Let me rephrase this. 谢谢你，我这么说好了 Why am l attracted to a person l know isn't good? 为什么我老是爱错人？ l happen to know the answer to this. Because you're hoping you're wrong, 我刚好知道答案 因为你祈求上苍是自己弄错了 and every time she does something that tells you she's no good, you ignore it, 她对你坏，你故意忽视 and every time she comes through and surprises you, she wins you over 她对你好，你就完全的死心塌地 and you lose that argument with yourself that she's not for you. 完全没想到其实是她不适合你 part 3 I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible, 我了解那种渺小又微不足道的感受 and how it can actually ache in places that you didn't know you had inside you, 就算遍体鳞伤也要故作坚强 and it doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get 不管换了几个新发型 or gyms you join or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends, 或是去健身或是和姊妹淘喝白酒 you still go to bed every night going over every detail, 日日夜夜都仍在回想着每个细节 and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. 纳闷自己到底哪里错了，哪里误解了 And how in the hell, for that brief moment, you could think that you were that happy? 最后自问怎么会把短暂的欢愉 错当成永久的快乐 And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light 有时候会说服自己 and show up at your door. 他会想清楚回来的 (SlGHS) And after all that, however long all that may be, 经历过这一切后 you'll go somewhere new 人还是会重新开始 and you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again, 再遇到值得付出的人 and little pieces of your soul will finally come back. 然后一点一点地重拾自信 And all that fuzzy stuff, 而那些模糊的回忆 those years of your life that you wasted, 那么多年浪费掉的人生 that will eventually begin to fade. 终究会开始消逝
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